I know what you’re thinking…
”She hasn’t blogged in a month, and she’s talking about lice!?!??!”
I know. Gross, right?
Quickly, here’s what we’ve been up to: I started watching a 2-year-old boy 10 hours a day every weekday, had a Spanish foreign exchange student for a month, took in a homeless boy for 2 weeks, Chinese foreign exchange student arrived for a year… and lice.
Let’s start with the ladder and work our way back.
(I’ll also be finishing up our vay-cay and sharing house stuff soon too!)
Brad left Sunday for a 4 day business trip to San Francisco. This is a big deal because we’ve never been apart for longer than 2 nights and that’s usually me on a woman’s retreat… which isn’t me home alone making game-plans for the robbers, who I’m sure are staking out our house regularly. (I’m insane.)
Side note: Military wives and fireman wives can laugh at me now. I don’t know how you do it ladies… rock on!
Anyway I dropped him off at the airport early (manly bag in tow), then went to church, came home for lunch and Sunday naps then cereal for dinner (because when Brad isn’t home, I put in zero effort towards dinner… I know I’m not the only one). Before dinner was over I had to leave the table because my head itched so much I wanted to wash it. I thought that was strange because I had just washed it the night before (I can usually go 2-3 days between washings if I haven’t worked out). After washing my hair I thought… maybe I have lice.
Nah… my scalp is just dry from being in the sun and pool and beach all summer.
But just to be safe, I’ll do a quick check.
Mmmmmm… what is that little speck?
What does lice even look like? I’ve never seen it before.
It’s probably just dirt from eating dinner outside… but I did just wash my hair… mmmm…
I had told the kiddos we would do a walk/bike ride after dinner so they were all ready to go when I got downstairs.
We start our walk… hey, wait… Did Eli just scratch his head??
I better do a quick check on the kids.
Cora Jane, let me look at your head…
Sweet eight pound 6 ounce baby Jesus what the flip is in your hair!?!?!?!?
EVERYONE LINE UP AND SHOW ME YOUR HAIR!!!!!
Crap.
I called Brad. No answer.
I text him.
Nothing.
I text two friends that went through the “lice thing” last year.
Of course I’m calm and collected.
Or maybe I was shallow-breathing-screechy-voice-yelling as I’m booking it home with 4 infested children while my mind is thinking of ALL the things our heads have touched.
Sweet Lord. Is there anything our heads HAVEN’T touched!?!?!?
Beds… couch… car… stuffed animals… rugs… towels… 4 Sunday School classes!!!!!!!!
We get home and I immediately load the kids into the car and head to CVS for chemicals.
At this point I’m so overwhelmed I would put anything on my itchy head to get rid of the lice.
Some friends had talked me down a bit and recommended The Hair Whisperers, Brad had called in between meetings and was able to arrange the lice expert to come to my house the next morning and take care of things. (Even from over 400 miles away he takes care of me… {sigh})
The kids are in the tub, I have my lice brush in hand, and I’m following the lice kit instructions to a T.
Hey… maybe I can do this myself and save the $$$ on the “lice expert.”
Um… two hours and barely a dent in the lice later, I would have paid $1,000 for the Lice Expert to come to my house at that moment and fix everything with a swipe of her Lousebuster magic.
I did the kit shampoo (causes cancer, I’m sure), then put in the combing gel, and got out a lot. Then I had the kids lay down and soak their heads in the water even though the “all knowing” internet says you can’t drown them this way. I actually got quite a few. They floated off so maybe they were the dead ones from the shampoo. Every louse I got off felt like a personal victory because they can lay 100 eggs a day!
A DAY!!!
Amidst the de-lousing, my darling husband sent me this picture from his hotel room window.
That was cruel.
Morning arrived and I think I may have only slept an hour – thinking about bugs crawling on my head. It was the longest morning ev-ah waiting for my lice expert, Wendy, from The Hair Whisperer to come over at 11am. She assessed the situation, and got to work. First directing me on what to wash and what just needed vacuuming.
First a half hour with the Lousebuster machine which blasts your head with really hot air to dry out eggs and kill live lice. I love on their site that it says to do the Lousebuster “if the thought of lice is paralyzing you from moving on with your life.”
Yep.
Then Wendy did an extensive (and expensive) comb-out with tea tree oil and conditioner. They comb till their comb is lice free for 5-10 minutes. 
It took hours for each child. Except Cy.
Looking back we should have shaved Eli’s head too.
Too much work for too much money.
How much? (you’re thinking)
Well… if you must know…
$697.00
Yep, you read that correctly!
Yep, the decimal point is in the correct location.
It was worth it though. And if you know how cheap I am, you know that it really was worth it. I couldn’t have done it that quickly or that well on my own and we have people over too often to risk spreading lice. Also, school is starting soon and being the “family that gave the whole school lice” is a label I’d prefer not to have.
Cheaper therapy bill for my kids later in life.
Moving on…
You leave the oil in for at least a day and you still have to do morning and evening comb-outs at home and wash anything your infested head touches.
The Lice Whisperer gives you the option to buy the nice lice brush to use for $17.00.
Yep, you read that correctly.
After spending almost $700 they will sell you the brush.
Good gravy.
They should give you the brush and a bag of your favorite candy just because it would ease the sting of getting parasites and spending a fortune to enter back into society.
That almost threw me over the edge. But I didn’t have the luxury of time to order one on amazon (for $11!!) so, they had me there.
I’ve already eaten a whole bag of Sour Patch Kids and am working my way through a Starburst bag… meaning all the pinks and yellows are gone… obviously.
Here’s some stuff I’ve learned about lice…
- You do need the lice nice lice comb Nit Free is the industry fave. I’ll let you borrow mine. (I have one, you know.) We can stick it to the man together. When your lice people ask if you want to buy a comb you can whip out my comb and say, “Suck it!” (Why does that bother me so much!?!? I’m insane.)
- Getting lice doesn’t mean you are dirty… it’s the opposite. They can’t stick well to dirty oily hair and love clean hair.
- Washable items should be washed on hot and dried on the hottest setting. You can also throw clean items in the dryer for 40 minutes and that does the trick.
- Anything you can’t wash, you have to quarantine (all pillows and stuffed animals) in a plastic trash bag, just in case there are any eggs (nits) in them. My lice expert said for 2 days but I’ve heard/read that 1-2 weeks is safest.
- You can just vacuum the couch, rugs and car seats. Lice can only latch to hair so they come up easily with a vacuum.
- There are tons of chemical free options. The Lousebuster is one – it’s just heat, then conditioner and essential oils. One of my friends suggested a Cetaphil treatment that looked pretty cool and if I had loads of time I think I would have tried it. I have other friends who tried the mayonnaise technique and it didn’t work. I just wanted everything to be over as soon as possible.
- I think prevention is the best. My good friend bought me some tea tree shampoo from Traders and another friend suggested getting tea tree essential oil and putting it in your shampoo once a week. I’m doing that for sure!
I’m still curious about how the lice could have spread to everyone in the family… oh…
Brad gets home from his business trip tonight. Here is a little letter just for him (and you, I guess)…
My Love,
You get home tonight after 4 nights away… the longest I’ve been apart from you in over 8 years. I’m planning on a wild night in the bedroom… clothes will be flying and I think we could go all night.
Smooches,
The Laundress
Folding clean de-loused laundry, people!!
Geesh!!
(I think I’m so funny.)
Here is Cy after his “lice hair” singing one of our favorite worship songs… just because.
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Kimi Finley says
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post! You’re writing cracks me up and is interesting! Thanks for blogging
pattie cordova says
Ugh… I had lice in school and then once as an adult – after using a helmet in Puerto Vallarta to bike up into the rainforest. It sucks. horribly. glad you got rid of it!
Cupcake Mom says
LOL — I went through this with my stepdaughter *before* all the “lice faery” services. It wasn’t very amusing. We tried the olive oil method first–big mistake (it didn’t work.)
I’m glad you were able to take care of this easily, it’s hard when your hubby is gone. (Mine usually has to go away the night before *I’m* leaving on a business trip, which makes things interesting.)
HUGS. I think they *should* give you the comb and some candy.
Jill says
Hahaha…this is so funny. Although, it probably didn’t seem funny at the time. I feel your pain.
Sharon Garofalow says
Oh. Crap. My head itches just reading this. I am fully, irrationally afraid of getting lice. We have never had it. But with my son’s long hair, I just know we don’t want it. He uses a supposed lice repelling shampoo every night and I spray him down with supposed lice repelling spray before school each day. It has tea tree oil and other smelly things in it. It may not help, but it helps quiet the voices in my head a bit. And then my youngest started school. And the very first day I found a lady digging through her daughters scalp on a bench out front of the classroom. So I very cautiously asked her if she was checking for lice, so you know I could start crying and freaking out and shaving my head. She became enraged!!! and said “NO! We are not dirty people!” Um, wow, that took a turn I wasn’t expecting. Turns out my son had just dumped a ton of sand in her hair on the playground. Whoopsie. So thank you for sharing your story. Because I too will call Lice Whisperer if I ever need to. And sell my car if I have to to pay for it. Effing lice.
Kelly says
As a lice professional I am so sorry you went through so much to get rid of lice- mostly money it seems! I saw that you used a company that used the louse buster. I hope you know that they guarantee with the use of that machine. Use it if you have too. I just can’t imagine how much they charged for it to be so much. I have never worked on a family of 3 and even earned half that much. I must be doing something wrong! or right. Lice are a pain but should not be this painful financially or emotionally. I like to take all the l guess work out of lice treatment and add a little humor. Advice is always free ( and so it a comb if you paid that much on treatment!). I alway recommend that you do preventative combing at least once a month from now into perpetuity (or when they move out. Which ever comes first!). This way you can catch the infestation early and it is much easier to get out. Remember not everyone itches when they have lice so waiting for signs of an infestation is not the way to go. The caveat to all of this is: As parents we all give our children something to go into therapy for at 30. Lice does not need to be that reason! Comb once but no more than twice a month. There is no reason for the kids to run screaming from you every time they see the lice comb. LOL
Take care and hopefully this will be your one and only run in with the cooties! I doubt it but even strong, smart woman can hope.
Keep Combing!
Kelly@headliceguru.com
Melisa says
Have smelled tea tree oil yet? I had read about it a month or so ago that it helps prevent lice so I bought it. Stunk up the whole bathroom. I also say money well spent and hope that I NEVER have to deal with that.
Crystal Anderson says
My head itches now…
That was really funny to read. I would’ve spent $700 to get bugs off of my fam too. But, like you, the $17 brush at the end would’ve made me want to punch that lady in the nose! Just saying…
Rachael says
I’m laughing (because you are funny and b/c this is so sad/annoying and such lovely timing with hubs gone) and wondering if my head itches while I read this… I just love you so. Wish I was there, not to share the lice, but the good times.
Andrea Howe says
Good gravy I enjoyed reading this. Sorry for the lice drama, but you handled it like a champ. Seriously. And my friend’s daughter has had lice way too many time to count, poor thing, they love her hair I guess. She calls those lice whisperer people every time and swears by them
carlee says
i spent $200 on the prescription shampoo after THREE treatments on all of us…i shaved bryson, shaved most of bodie’s head and cut bobby’s but couldn’t bring myself to cut all of it…and just one bottle worked for all 5 of us…it kills the nits AND the lice, which is why it is so much…i found out about the lice ladies after – I forget the name of them up here…lice angels…or something…anyway – i totally would have done it…after all the treatments I bought, all the time I took every night going through their hair, the 5 different combs i bought – i probably spent the same…i suck at picking nits and my kids hated me for a month checking their hair every day. lice SUCKS…and i am so paranoid we are going to get it again…but your post made me laugh – you write so well 🙂
Jaime Jenkins says
Girlllllllll…worth every penny. Love you forever. XOXO
Jill says
As the school nurse that has had to send far too many kids home to infested houses and mothers that won’t even take the free coupon for Nix, I thank you from the bottom of my heart! Lice does not discriminate but they will not go away on their own.
I say $700 well spent. Easy for me to say since it didn’t come from my pocket.